12.6.10 — Monday Morning Tequila

This is almost the perfect food item for an advertising agency first thing on a Monday morning — Tequila filled chocolates.

The aroma coming out of the plastic container (with a classy gold plastic screw on lid, of course), was super sweet booze. I got a little buzz just breathing that in.

Booze and chocolate have been paired up for a long time. My mom used to make rum balls at Christmas that I absolutely loved, and yes they had real rum in them. It does seem like a good way to absolutely maximize your calorie intake in one bite-sized package. I almost want someone to pound all of these down to see how many it would take to actually get you drunk.

I won't be that person.

12.3.10 — I'm gone for a couple days...

I was out sick a couple days this week. After staying home and resting up, I made it into work this fine Friday to be greeted by what else than more Top Pot donuts.

Is anyone else here just done with the whole donut thing? Isn't it time for the fad to fade and these sugar and fat-laden bombs to be relegated back to the 24-hour coffee shop and the creatures who inhabit them?

And then...



Time for the monthly manager's meeting. Apparently, these meetings are so fun that the only way to lure everyone there is to dangle fried chicken, mashed potatoes, potato salad, rolls and gravy under their noses. When it all came in (from Ezell's again), I walked past the meeting room and got a face full of the smell. It honestly made me a bit queasy. The overwhelming aroma of fried food smothered in grease just about turned me off lunch altogether. If I went off my diet today and was open for food business, I'm not sure I could actually jump into the chicken and fixin's full force. None of it is appetizing anymore.

Bleh.

And just to top it off...



Cookies from Trader Joe's, called Joe Joes. 4 flavors: Double Chocolate, Peppermint, Peanut Butter and Ginger. The Peppermint and Peanut Butter were gone in minutes. Surprisingly, the Double Chocolate are lasting the longest. Each cookie is about a half inch tall and a couple inches across. 130 calories per cookie. A couple people have had one of each. 4 cookies have more calories more than the majority of my meals. One and a half cookies equals about 20 ounces — that's 1.25 pounds of diced watermelon and pineapple (I know this because I've been eating that for my evening snack). Is it any wonder how calories can sneak up on you if you aren't tracking them? Today alone between the donuts, fried chicken and now these cookies, I could have added a cool 2,000 calories minimum to my daily total. That's kind of crazy, and that's how you get to 400+ pounds my friends.

11.29.10 — Jelly Bean Roulette

Um... yeah, right.

I watched someone get the Puke, Canned Dog Food and Rotten Egg flavors. Even if I was eating everything under the Sun I'd be passing on this one.

11.24.10 — Status Snacks

Our team has been working hard lately and today was the drop dead deadline for getting a ton of stuff out the door before Thanksgiving. The account team manager brought in some breakfast goodies for our morning status meeting to get the morning started on a good note.

The OJ did appeal. Orange juice is my favorite juice. In fact, I really have a hard time with any other kind of juice. I love to eat apples, but can't handle apple juice. Same thing with grapes, cranberries, etc. For me, its orange juice or nothing. Even mixed orange juice options like these ones are okay.

On the other hand, that's a lot of empty calories. Its been a long time since I had any... and it will be a long time before I have any. Yesterday I ate the pizza, today I'm back to normal.

11.23.10 — Full Disclosure

So a couple inches of snow shut down Seattle on Monday night and only a skeleton crew made it into the agency on Tuesday. Our owner decided to reward those of us who managed to meet the minimum requirements for our jobs - showing up - by buying pizza for lunch.

Of all the foods I've given up over the last few months as I've pushed to reach my weight loss goals, two have been the hardest: french fries and pizza. Unfortunately, these two items seem to make regularly scheduled appearances in our office, especially pizza.

Here I was again, facing the imminent arrival of one of my favorite foods and, knowing how we order things in Costco-level quantities, a lot of it. I made sure to eat my lunch ahead of time, just so I wasn't hungry when the pizza appeared. The snow slowed down the delivery, so it ended up being more of an afternoon snack than lunch for everyone.

I was a little peckish, but not starving when it finally arrived. I was prepared to do my thing, go in for a couple iPhone shots and then head back to my desk like usual. But then I got to thinking. I'm an adult. I know the consequences. I'm not desperate or hungry or breaking down. I didn't feel like I deserved a treat or a cheat. I simply decided to have some pizza.

I think if I had been starving, or desperate for something other than salad, or feeling like I had done something to deserve a food reward that I would have stopped myself. As weird as it sounds, I felt like making the decision to have the pizza from a calm, logical mindset made it okay. I don't think I was coming up with any justifications, I just decided to have some, enjoy it and take whatever consequences come. I also decided that by doing this, I will have to make sure I don't make the same kind of decision again any time soon.

That's the hard part about moderation, isn't it. Do it once, maybe once in awhile, but it can't become a pattern or a frequent occurrence because then it's not moderation. So, here's my test. I had some pizza. It was good. And now I have to be even more diligent and disciplined than before.

11.19.10 — Morning Lumps, Boobies then Pie

It's been awhile. I was beginning to think my coworkers had thrown in the towel. But no, as this platter of Specialties cookies n' lumps proves.

While I know deep down that eating one of those gigantic cookies would taste good (although not orgasmically good — Specialties tends to be a little greasy), I'm pretty sure just one of those bad boys would come close to wiping out my calorie budget for the day.

I don't think anything can taste so good that it's worth blowing a whole day's worth of calories.



And then they hit me with the boobie cake. It was a coworker's 40th birthday, so his team got him this boobie cake. There were jokes, some motorboating and incriminating photos. The boobies were solid marzipan and about as real feeling as, well, big fake boobs.



And if you have boobies, you need to have a slice of pie...

Our building had a "tenant appreciation" pumpkin pie giveaway. Odd, yes, but apparently one of the servers was a total fox so everyone went down for a piece. Ahem.

I did not. I figured as long as it was down in the lobby, it didn't concern me. But then, a couple hours later, the leftover pies show up in our kitchen. Seriously? Are we now the unhealthy food dumping ground for our entire building? What the hell?

11.9.10 — Sigh (and Candy)

Top Pot. Again. For like the billionth time.

Is this what waterboarding feels like? A constant, steady, unrelenting drip, drip, drip until you can't take it anymore and just give over your will to your torturer? You find yourself so helpless against the quiet barrage that you don't have a choice any longer and let the inevitable happen?

Sigh.

I chew my gum. I eat my apple. I mix my granola into my greek yogurt and take a few more drips on the forehead. The inevitable does not happen today.



More Halloween leftovers appeared in our row this afternoon. Eh. Not really even a little tempted.