Thursday, November 25, 2010

11.23.10 — Full Disclosure

11.22.10 - Full Disclosure

So a couple inches of snow shut down Seattle on Monday night and only a skeleton crew made it into the agency on Tuesday. Our owner decided to reward those of us who managed to meet the minimum requirements for our jobs - showing up - by buying pizza for lunch.

Of all the foods I've given up over the last few months as I've pushed to reach my weight loss goals, two have been the hardest: french fries and pizza. Unfortunately, these two items seem to make regularly scheduled appearances in our office, especially pizza.

Here I was again, facing the imminent arrival of one of my favorite foods and, knowing how we order things in Costco-level quantities, a lot of it. I made sure to eat my lunch ahead of time, just so I wasn't hungry when the pizza appeared. The snow slowed down the delivery, so it ended up being more of an afternoon snack than lunch for everyone.

I was a little peckish, but not starving when it finally arrived. I was prepared to do my thing, go in for a couple iPhone shots and then head back to my desk like usual. But then I got to thinking. I'm an adult. I know the consequences. I'm not desperate or hungry or breaking down. I didn't feel like I deserved a treat or a cheat. I simply decided to have some pizza.

I think if I had been starving, or desperate for something other than salad, or feeling like I had done something to deserve a food reward that I would have stopped myself. As weird as it sounds, I felt like making the decision to have the pizza from a calm, logical mindset made it okay. I don't think I was coming up with any justifications, I just decided to have some, enjoy it and take whatever consequences come. I also decided that by doing this, I will have to make sure I don't make the same kind of decision again any time soon.

That's the hard part about moderation, isn't it. Do it once, maybe once in awhile, but it can't become a pattern or a frequent occurrence because then it's not moderation. So, here's my test. I had some pizza. It was good. And now I have to be even more diligent and disciplined than before.

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