3.18 - Ugh

I may have to check back over my history of posts, but I think this may be the most unappetizing thing I've seen yet, aside from the potato salad (and just thinking about it for the few seconds it's taken for me to type this was enough to make me get queasy).

Rhubarb pie. Looks like a squid pot pie and is almost as vomit-inducing as a squid pot pie would surely be.

How can anyone look at that and say, "Damn. I got to have me a big ass slice of that tasty rhubarb." What the hell is a rhubarb anyway? Someone said it's a relative of celery. WTF? Do people make celery pie? No, that would be disgusting.

11.19.10 — Morning Lumps, Boobies then Pie

It's been awhile. I was beginning to think my coworkers had thrown in the towel. But no, as this platter of Specialties cookies n' lumps proves.

While I know deep down that eating one of those gigantic cookies would taste good (although not orgasmically good — Specialties tends to be a little greasy), I'm pretty sure just one of those bad boys would come close to wiping out my calorie budget for the day.

I don't think anything can taste so good that it's worth blowing a whole day's worth of calories.



And then they hit me with the boobie cake. It was a coworker's 40th birthday, so his team got him this boobie cake. There were jokes, some motorboating and incriminating photos. The boobies were solid marzipan and about as real feeling as, well, big fake boobs.



And if you have boobies, you need to have a slice of pie...

Our building had a "tenant appreciation" pumpkin pie giveaway. Odd, yes, but apparently one of the servers was a total fox so everyone went down for a piece. Ahem.

I did not. I figured as long as it was down in the lobby, it didn't concern me. But then, a couple hours later, the leftover pies show up in our kitchen. Seriously? Are we now the unhealthy food dumping ground for our entire building? What the hell?

10.11.10 — Pie Sunday Leftovers

Every so often, one of my coworkers hosts Pie Sunday. She bakes a ton of pies and has people over to eat pie, watch movies and hang out. My wife and I didn't go this time because sitting in a room full of pie and people eating pie would be a new kind of hell since we couldn't, or wouldn't, join in. No worries since the hostess brought the leftovers to work today.

I'm not going to do my normal find the grossest thing about the food item to try and convince myself that whatever it is that I'm not eating tastes horrible anyway, so I'm not missing anything. I've done Pie Sunday before. They are all delicious. Seriously delicious. People go into food comas after eating this pie.

Sigh. No pie-induced coma for me.



Here is a melange of several pies, including apple and pecan.



This is a Gluten- and Lactose-free Blueberry Crisp. I don't know how one makes a crisp that is both gluten and lactose free, but she is the master at these kinds of things.